 
Balletlover - Balletmania
written by Gary at on 17.11. at 01:13:20 - as answer to: Re: How my tights fetish started by Doug at >It parallels a lot of what I went through as a young kid, the sneaking around, the anxiety over where to try them on, what would happen if I got caught, all that stuff. >I remember my first time was in the school play where my first grade teacher had us all be understudies for other parts. It happened that my best friend at the time was in the elf crowd and got sick. At the last moment I was told to put on a green pair of tights (no underwear! I was told sternly) and the elf costume. The moment before I went into the dressing room, my friend having overcome his illness, grudgingly took the costume from me. And it's all history from there. >Any girl's houses I would go to might end up in a play time in their rooms, at which point I would take the opportunity to ask to dress up like a superhero. Which worked sometimes, othertimes my friend would get miffed from me stretching out her tights. It was only into my adolescence that things got more involved. >I would go through my sister's clothes for a pair of tights or leotard or try to sqeeze my feet into her pointe shoes. I would daydream up schemes to get a leotard and tights and wear them in public without public disapproval. Sears catalogs with the girls arrayed in every color of nylon would be hidden somewhere safe in my house.>It wasn't until I worked up the nerve to purchase my own bodywear that I felt that I owned up to this quirk in my personality. I wish I could thank all the dancewear store clerks at this point. I found a little suspicion at first, a young man purchasing women's tights and leotards, but on the whole I've gotten a good deal of unspoken sympathy from them. And I felt like I needed a little understanding. I really haven't felt to this day that I can trust anyone with this rather ridiculous secret. I say ridiculous because usually I end up standing there in a pretty leotard and tights thinking about how my whole life centers around this need sometimes. And it would be hard to tell the world about how much it affects me. But it's really hard to live my life any other way.>>Whew. So with that said, the only angle that I haven't tried is therapy. Sounds like it's worth talking to someone who has a neutral stance on this (as much as I like looking into this forum now and then). It'll probably be the same conclusion, because I couldn't really see myself giving this up. And it'll be hard to open up this need to anyone I'm involved with. Any help on this point would be greatly appreciated. >But it's good to hear your voice on this. Thanks again for writing what your experiences are. Hi Doug,Thanks for sharing too. It's always comforting to hear experiences from others that are similiar. It's interesting how some of your details parallel mine. A couple of times, way early in my childhood, I would get my sister to let me wear her tights. But after a while, she had the same complaint--that I was stretching them out. She refused afterward, and threatened to tell mother. Have you ever wondered how you'd be if tights never existed? It's something that used to tickle my mind, intensively at times. At this point, I've come to accept it, and actually feel a little thankful. I'm a fairly good looking guy, and I imagine that if I hadn't been distracted by tights, I would have been more sexually active and put myself at greater risk for STD's. On the other hand, it's this whole acceptance thing with a partner. I would be devastated if the woman I was in love with rejected me because of them. Actually, one experience I had with a girlfriend gave me a bit of a realization, somewhat along the lines of what someone else said in this thread. It's the way you introduce it, that can make all the difference. In the past, when I let a girlfriend of mine know about it, I was very fearful. To the point where I was in tears about it before I could even say anything. She thought I was going to tell her some horrible secret. In the first few moments after I told her, she was confused, and thought it strange. But later on, she was OK with it. She had said if I hadn't acted so upset, it wouldn't have startled her. Unfortunately, things didn't work out with her in the long run (I actually broke it off). Now I'm with someone else, who I've been with for nearly a year, and I have to tell her... she already knows I have a thing for seeing her in tights/pantyhose. Yet I also know that she doesn't care for guys in tights (I asked her if she ever went to ballet performances, and she said she hadn't because of the guys wearing tights bothered her). If she's in love with me enough, maybe she'll tolerate it. Otherwise... One other thing: Do you ever think about how you'll be with this fetish in the future? I wonder if one day I'll simply discover I've tired of it. That even wearing tights feels a bit of a bother, enough to get me to dump them all one day. If not, I find it funny to imagine myself as a 60 year old man still doing this... well, at least I'd be hiding all of the spider and varicose veins!!! Answers to this message: |
