 
Balletlover - Balletmania
written by Seamless at on 25.05. at 23:02:00 - as answer to: I just threw out my whole tights collection. by one more try! at >this is the, i don't know, 10th try, but i am really trying to beat this thing. It keeps from normal relationships - I guess this is the wrong place to ask if anyone here has suceeded?--Ah, the fetish struggle... I know it all too well. I hope that those of us here who have relayed our advice and experiences have been helpful to you. Here's my .02: It sounds to me like your particular fetish is a strong one... but I don't know if that is what is preventing you from having relationships or if it may be a symptom of not having fulfilling relationships in the first place (tights, in their own way, can be c0mforting--the symbology of being "hugged" by nylon). You have to explore that for yourself. Usually the most c0mmon loathing or remorse of having a fetish is due to the fear of rejection, that you will be judged and rejected by potential lovers. Isn't that the worst possible experience in relationships, getting rejected for part of who you are? Because it's true... the fetish is part of you. It has molded you in some way, and influenced how your personality has unfolded over the years (everything you do repeatedly does, in some fashion). Whether you like it or not, it is filling a need. Understanding why you have it is helpful, but even more important is the reason why you want to get rid of it. Is it fear of judgement from others? Is it concern that it interferes with your sexuality? Sexual Interference: If you often fill your sexual needs with tights more than anything else, you will find your sex drive for the human touch will be less intense. And it is quite possible that over time, psychologically you can bec0me "acclimated" to experiencing sex that way. Then the mere anxiety of wondering if you can "perform" with a human partner will weaken or abort the experience. That was always my greatest fear... that tights would "transform" me into a celebate man, with respect to women. That only tights would be able to satisfy me. But where the mind is concerned, there are always possibilities. Self-reform is the key. Take a break from the tights and find release by fantasizing of the situations you really want to be in (video can help a lot with that). How do you stimulate yourself while wearing tights? It's not the same way you'd do it otherwise. So get out the cream, lotion, or whatever, and make sure that the traditional way of being stimulated feels natural. And above all, release all expectations. Not every man is a stud each time in bed. The best thing to do is accept the fetish for what it is, how it has served you, and then shift your perspective. Once you can release yourself from the fetish anxiety and recognize it as an "additional" form of sexual expression, you now have an asset rather than a detriment. Sexuality is mostly in the mind. The more things that can stimulate you sexually, the greater variety you have at hand in the human condition. So, those were some seeds to new ideas for you... water them and see what happens. :-) ~Seamless~ Answers to this message:
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