FD - what you are feeling is a reflection of what you feel. STOP FEELING ASHAMED or strange about your love of ballet.
In truth, the winds have shifted a bit. It was more acceptable 10-20 for a man to dance ballet. But it is still fine.
The thing to do in order to conquer this - is to be good - really good. Work your butt off - the most important thing is barre work. All the great tricks (like double tours) will happen once your body is aligned properly and that happens only from intense work at the barre.
If you are single and straight being in a ballet class is like being a kid in a candy store.